getting out of bed/sending out emails woot woot tedium be fucking awesome!
streamate, flirt4free, cam girl, model, gogo dancer and all around nerdy nerd nerdette. Adventures and random thoughts there in w/ shiney new pictures too!! (formally on kinklive until further notice)
Saturday, June 18, 2011
what are you most afraid of in this life?
Giving all of yourself to someone and finding that they didn't love you even half as much as you did and thus time was wasted. The possibility that this person may not exist or was passed over... life's uncertainties both scare me and excite me
Friday, June 17, 2011
Your like the only person who asks me questions lol
That's not really a question though is it hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!?!?$!% lol I kinda get a kick out of this site. :D
Thursday, June 16, 2011
What is your opinion of me and would I be someone that you would consider dating?
I don't know you so I cant' say that I'd date you :-/
Arcade Adventures!
I'm some what saddened by the loss of my old shit-tastic phone. I mean it was reliable. I was comfy with it and it did the bare minimum of phone like tasks fairly well. Had a tiny screen and decent enough battery life. It was the little phone that could. If there's one thing I learned in my month of community college schooling though it's that this is not the way to start off an essay (as this is to set the tone right?). The first paragraph is supposed to establish what the whole thing is about and I started on a random tangent. Good thing I wont be graded for this.
Another moot point! Soooooo I never had advertisements on here b/c I simply couldn't figure out html. and the whole not having a mailing address really can grind one's gears. BUT now that I do... I'll be working diligently on cluster fucking my page w/ cluster fucked things. Apparently since I have "adult" material I cannot use certain mainstream shit (go figure). So I decided to go the porn route instead, half cause it amused me and half b/c who the fuck doesn't like porn? If you would like a banner on my humble Internet hub... shoots me an an email plz!
Now that all that random is out of the way I can tell you about my arcade day Monday. The bus ride was... strange. I got hit on a lot and a lot of weird stares. I'm not sure if it's more than normal cause up until recently it's not something I payed much attention to. Having an MP3 player tends to help you drown out more of the static noise of everyone. (I did put some music on my new phone so but considering I don't know the strength of the battery life... we'll see how much I end up really using it.) I got asked what school I was going to... apparently my usage of children's bags and sweaters is a bit turn on for strange old men and hobos.... I managed to get serenaded by one which was.... quite frightening. I wanted to pull my giant cam out and record him but a more logical head prevailed. He seemed semi drunk while shouting out "SHE IS BEAUTIFUL... THIS GIRL RIGHT HERE BEAUTIFUL" and then some strange song began. I cracked one of the most awkward smiles of my life and proceeded inside lol.
Another side note and tip for penis havers... saying a pretty girl is pretty isn't really the route you wanna go unless you're really sure she's quite unaware of it. That sort of thing would've been really impressive in high school or even early adulthood/20's.... at this point I'm aware of my worth. I don't need ego stroking when one wants to approach me. A more impressive and effective method (not saying for all girls but those who know they're attractive and aren't narcissistic cunt rags... ) would be if you notice something a girl is reading, a t shirt, anything you can show some interest in and not making seem like you're so desperate to put your dick into something... tends to work better. If you can make a girl laugh that's a bonus too. Essentially taking interest in something other than looks b/c there was probably 10 guys before you spitting the same tired ass game and when you're my age you've heard all these lines before. If she's a shallow needy bitch though she'll love stringing you along just to hear you compliment her all the time etc. Guess it's a slippery slope and what route you take should depend on your ultimate goal... whether this person is someone you'd like to get to know or just try to fuck... alright end of tangent lol
I played a lot of wtf are those basketball games called. I took a picture of my best score.
Some guy came in later and totally raped my score T_T lol 80% accuracy or some shit. I didn't realize anyone else really played this thing. I want to do it more often... then maybe I wouldn't have suck weak ass arms.
I played Mark of the Wolves for the first time EVAR!!! SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!! I had pics on my old phone but... dey iz goan noaw. That's ok though. Next time I make an appearance (which probably won't be for a while... I'm dreadfully beyond broke) I'll be sure to take a new picture. I will say the top system (you can place a small shiney bar either at the start end or middle of ur health bar. When your health reaches this point you go into super powerful mode. It's quite interesting strategy. risk it when you first get in to get an edge on the opponent or use it as a last resort. A lot of characters will go in w/ it so it can make things kinda difficult.) is pretty dope but I fucking suck so much at SNK fighting games. I also had trouble with the button set up they had there. I'm used to both kicks being together so it was real awkward for me.
I played some puzzle bobble and got to about stage 16 or 17... can't quite remember but for some reason a crowd formed. It was quite strange as I'm only used to crowds forming around dancing games (DDR, Pump it Up, ITG etc.) The best I've done on that game was around level 30 and that was only one time YEARS ago. I was shocked to get half way but I guess you never really forget how to play puzzle bobble lol either. Also had a crowd going for Aero Fighters II... but I'm decent at that game so that wasn't as weird for me.
Played a few games of Pump It Up... realizing that I really can't do any of the shit I'd done years ago. Still all this old ass scores sitting there (since no one plays at that arcade anymore.) My knee began to bother me and I remembered a big deciding factor in not playing these types of games anymore. It's simply not good for me and ends up being painful. Some really nice girl talked to me for a bit. She used to play doubles on DDR and quit for like 6 years or so.
OH got some Silent Scope time in! I messed up on the locate the snipers stage and shot someone who didnt' have a gun out so I died lol.Up until then though I got really good grades on all the stages. Got a few S's too!! Wish I could say the same for Police 911. I can't play that game for the life of me. Too much movement I suppose.
Someone joined me on House of the Dead. It's always weird when I play with another person b/c they're usually not that good. This is not to say I'm fucking the one guy whose name is in all the machines in a 50 mile radius who by chance I finally saw in person at James Games playing with two guns... eyes a glow like I'd just seen a mythical unicorn. (Not just cause he was fucking amazing but he didn't look as I expected. He was easy on the eyes indeed.) It does make it a bit more difficult though when you're covering for another person and yourself though. I doubt I'll ever get past the second stage on one credit EVER!! lol!
So that was my arcade day! Hopefully I can visit another place soon or that one again cause I really wanna play Mark of the Wolves again. I know I could emulate it but that's not really the same :(
Interview today... hope it goes non-shitty and they don't ask me to make a stupid fucking outfit like the last one did :-/
you're silenced siren... smelling mechanical roses since 2009 (oh and keep those youtube questions, things coming... hell anything you'd like to hear me talk/write about. Thank you for all the new follows on Deviant Art and Tumblr and Twitter. I do appreciate it! (and those that I oh a special dance video to... I'll get on that when I return home... I not so computer savvy so I fucked up trying to email such large files. :D)
End Transmission
Another moot point! Soooooo I never had advertisements on here b/c I simply couldn't figure out html. and the whole not having a mailing address really can grind one's gears. BUT now that I do... I'll be working diligently on cluster fucking my page w/ cluster fucked things. Apparently since I have "adult" material I cannot use certain mainstream shit (go figure). So I decided to go the porn route instead, half cause it amused me and half b/c who the fuck doesn't like porn? If you would like a banner on my humble Internet hub... shoots me an an email plz!
Now that all that random is out of the way I can tell you about my arcade day Monday. The bus ride was... strange. I got hit on a lot and a lot of weird stares. I'm not sure if it's more than normal cause up until recently it's not something I payed much attention to. Having an MP3 player tends to help you drown out more of the static noise of everyone. (I did put some music on my new phone so but considering I don't know the strength of the battery life... we'll see how much I end up really using it.) I got asked what school I was going to... apparently my usage of children's bags and sweaters is a bit turn on for strange old men and hobos.... I managed to get serenaded by one which was.... quite frightening. I wanted to pull my giant cam out and record him but a more logical head prevailed. He seemed semi drunk while shouting out "SHE IS BEAUTIFUL... THIS GIRL RIGHT HERE BEAUTIFUL" and then some strange song began. I cracked one of the most awkward smiles of my life and proceeded inside lol.
Another side note and tip for penis havers... saying a pretty girl is pretty isn't really the route you wanna go unless you're really sure she's quite unaware of it. That sort of thing would've been really impressive in high school or even early adulthood/20's.... at this point I'm aware of my worth. I don't need ego stroking when one wants to approach me. A more impressive and effective method (not saying for all girls but those who know they're attractive and aren't narcissistic cunt rags... ) would be if you notice something a girl is reading, a t shirt, anything you can show some interest in and not making seem like you're so desperate to put your dick into something... tends to work better. If you can make a girl laugh that's a bonus too. Essentially taking interest in something other than looks b/c there was probably 10 guys before you spitting the same tired ass game and when you're my age you've heard all these lines before. If she's a shallow needy bitch though she'll love stringing you along just to hear you compliment her all the time etc. Guess it's a slippery slope and what route you take should depend on your ultimate goal... whether this person is someone you'd like to get to know or just try to fuck... alright end of tangent lol
I played a lot of wtf are those basketball games called. I took a picture of my best score.
I played Mark of the Wolves for the first time EVAR!!! SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!! I had pics on my old phone but... dey iz goan noaw. That's ok though. Next time I make an appearance (which probably won't be for a while... I'm dreadfully beyond broke) I'll be sure to take a new picture. I will say the top system (you can place a small shiney bar either at the start end or middle of ur health bar. When your health reaches this point you go into super powerful mode. It's quite interesting strategy. risk it when you first get in to get an edge on the opponent or use it as a last resort. A lot of characters will go in w/ it so it can make things kinda difficult.) is pretty dope but I fucking suck so much at SNK fighting games. I also had trouble with the button set up they had there. I'm used to both kicks being together so it was real awkward for me.
I played some puzzle bobble and got to about stage 16 or 17... can't quite remember but for some reason a crowd formed. It was quite strange as I'm only used to crowds forming around dancing games (DDR, Pump it Up, ITG etc.) The best I've done on that game was around level 30 and that was only one time YEARS ago. I was shocked to get half way but I guess you never really forget how to play puzzle bobble lol either. Also had a crowd going for Aero Fighters II... but I'm decent at that game so that wasn't as weird for me.
Played a few games of Pump It Up... realizing that I really can't do any of the shit I'd done years ago. Still all this old ass scores sitting there (since no one plays at that arcade anymore.) My knee began to bother me and I remembered a big deciding factor in not playing these types of games anymore. It's simply not good for me and ends up being painful. Some really nice girl talked to me for a bit. She used to play doubles on DDR and quit for like 6 years or so.
OH got some Silent Scope time in! I messed up on the locate the snipers stage and shot someone who didnt' have a gun out so I died lol.Up until then though I got really good grades on all the stages. Got a few S's too!! Wish I could say the same for Police 911. I can't play that game for the life of me. Too much movement I suppose.
Someone joined me on House of the Dead. It's always weird when I play with another person b/c they're usually not that good. This is not to say I'm fucking the one guy whose name is in all the machines in a 50 mile radius who by chance I finally saw in person at James Games playing with two guns... eyes a glow like I'd just seen a mythical unicorn. (Not just cause he was fucking amazing but he didn't look as I expected. He was easy on the eyes indeed.) It does make it a bit more difficult though when you're covering for another person and yourself though. I doubt I'll ever get past the second stage on one credit EVER!! lol!
So that was my arcade day! Hopefully I can visit another place soon or that one again cause I really wanna play Mark of the Wolves again. I know I could emulate it but that's not really the same :(
Interview today... hope it goes non-shitty and they don't ask me to make a stupid fucking outfit like the last one did :-/
End Transmission
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
What's your honest opinion of me? (if you're brave you'll press ask followers)
lol... you seem nice so far but I don't know you well enough to make a real judgement
are you going to get the new Duke Nukem Forever game?
NO cause I'm poor... but it did look fun and I miss those games :'(
Another lately update
I've noticed I haven't been writing much lately. Guess that's the sign of progress. I haven't felt much of a need and I've been keeping busy w/ working on myself and other random tasks.
Though things are not perfect and I doubt that they ever will be, things are good. I still worry about money (as usual) but beyond that I don't worry about too much else. Been pretty tame.
I've got another interview tomorrow which will hopefully go well... though I'm not set on it either way. We'll just see what happens. Another potential job thing that I hope will work out. If not I know something will come along soon enough so I'm going to enjoy the fee time that I have now.
Weekend plans... I was sketchy on them at first but now I think I know what I'll do. I'm not sure how it will turn out. I'll stay positive though... face my demons lest demons rule the day yes? If it does end up being a bad decision no biggie. I can always phone a friend :)
I'm feeling pretty good about life... and can't wait to get the photos back from Saturday's shoot!!! I HOPE THEY'RE DONE SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Until then I'll just keep working on the cluster fuck of photos that I still have to finish editing/uploading to Deviantart. Other than that check me out on twitter, tumblr, modelmayhem.... YO FACE?
find more of this artist's work here
End Transmission
Though things are not perfect and I doubt that they ever will be, things are good. I still worry about money (as usual) but beyond that I don't worry about too much else. Been pretty tame.
I've got another interview tomorrow which will hopefully go well... though I'm not set on it either way. We'll just see what happens. Another potential job thing that I hope will work out. If not I know something will come along soon enough so I'm going to enjoy the fee time that I have now.
Weekend plans... I was sketchy on them at first but now I think I know what I'll do. I'm not sure how it will turn out. I'll stay positive though... face my demons lest demons rule the day yes? If it does end up being a bad decision no biggie. I can always phone a friend :)
I'm feeling pretty good about life... and can't wait to get the photos back from Saturday's shoot!!! I HOPE THEY'RE DONE SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Until then I'll just keep working on the cluster fuck of photos that I still have to finish editing/uploading to Deviantart. Other than that check me out on twitter, tumblr, modelmayhem.... YO FACE?
End Transmission
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
What's the worst injury you've had, and how did it happen?
living at home, I received it by not doing my adult duty and taking proper care of myself
What would you do if your family member tells you that she's dating your ex-boyfriend? How would you acted?
I'd be a bit confused cause I doubt anyone in my family would mesh well with anyone I've dated. Depending on the time passed I might be upset. It would be a little awkward though. Don't think we'd be double dating or anything lol
Sunday, June 12, 2011
whats your favorite cartoon from the 80's?
inspector gadget comes to mind... I like more 90's cartoons than 80's one's though lol
What's the best thing that has happened to you so far in 2011?
Honestly I dunno... it's been a rocky start... uh yeah there's really nothing great to report
An Introduction done in mediocre minor??!$!$
So I think my thing will be to record these when I can and to upload them on Sunday's (unless...I some how become uber busy... don't seem likely though lol)
I know I should've done this first (well not at the time actually lol it should've crossed my scattered thoughts haha)... well at least it's done now.
If you guys have anymore questions and stuff feel free to send them to me too... I think if I get the energy I'll go ahead and finally make that dancing video I've been wanting to make forever. It won't be great but at least I would have something to link folks to when applying for dancing jobs. It also might be a bit of fun!
My plans for today have been turned upside down but which means I'll have to adjust tomorrow's plans as well but... I'll figure this shit out.
Note to self: I must ABSOLUTELY stop eating sugary things on the left side of my mouth because it makes that side of my face hurt tremendously. Can't wait to get money to fix everything. Dreams of cars, privacy, quiet and...cheesecake, mountains of it dance in my head.
Pics from yesterday's shoot to come!!! It was pretty nice. Some experimenting w/ using flashlight's as lighting. Interesting. From the examples I saw it should turn out pretty cool and moody. Jon ortiz's port can be found here in the meantime. Respectful, Responsible, Chill non-creepy rapey dude! Plus his studio was real easy to find which is always a plus for us bus riding fucks!
End Transmission
I know I should've done this first (well not at the time actually lol it should've crossed my scattered thoughts haha)... well at least it's done now.
If you guys have anymore questions and stuff feel free to send them to me too... I think if I get the energy I'll go ahead and finally make that dancing video I've been wanting to make forever. It won't be great but at least I would have something to link folks to when applying for dancing jobs. It also might be a bit of fun!
My plans for today have been turned upside down but which means I'll have to adjust tomorrow's plans as well but... I'll figure this shit out.
Note to self: I must ABSOLUTELY stop eating sugary things on the left side of my mouth because it makes that side of my face hurt tremendously. Can't wait to get money to fix everything. Dreams of cars, privacy, quiet and...cheesecake, mountains of it dance in my head.
Pics from yesterday's shoot to come!!! It was pretty nice. Some experimenting w/ using flashlight's as lighting. Interesting. From the examples I saw it should turn out pretty cool and moody. Jon ortiz's port can be found here in the meantime. Respectful, Responsible, Chill non-creepy rapey dude! Plus his studio was real easy to find which is always a plus for us bus riding fucks!
End Transmission
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